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Wednesday, July 25, 2007 :::

Speed Bumps

I'm constantly amazed that there seems to be a market for absolutely everything:

Just in case you were looking for a little love and tenderNASCAR.

I can't understand why NASCAR has a fan base to begin with, especially when you take into consideration how insufferably boring it is, so I really can't believe there is actually a market for NASCAR harliquin romance novels, yet there they were on the shelf at the book store when I just happened to be shopping for J-Ball's birthday present...

I chose Speed Bumps for J-Balls because I liked the feminist approach of the catchphrase on its cover: "She was born to race... deal with it!" She was surprised to realize that it was indeed written for adult women, and not thirteen-year-old tomboys who are too butch for Sweet Valley High. I'm wondering if anyone has ever purchased a NASCAR romance title with the sincere intention of reading it, or if they were all just gag gifts.

Speaking of gag, this might be the worst book title ever, even in the world of romance novels:

And while we're still on the subject of romance novels, notice anything wrong with this cover?

Subtitled: Prince Valiant Porks the Three-Armed Circus Freak

::: posted by dan at 5:26 PM :: [ link ] :: (14) comments Social Bookmark Button

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14 previous comments:

that's a new low for women everywhere.

well, except for the south, i suppose.

By Blogger Honey Bunny, at 6:56 PM  

Love that! Love THIS:

...hope that link posts ok.... if not, go to
then "Features"
then "Longmire Does Romance Novels"

...don't know what else is on his site, but the romance novels are a freeeekin' riot.

By Anonymous Fran with one "N", at 12:00 AM  

Haha - her facial expression is pricelss. I'm sure she'll be "on the edge of her seat as she reads about the thrilling twists and turns both on the racetrack and on the track to love"...

By Anonymous Richard, at 3:15 AM  

But NASCAR is fun, because the cars go around and around and around and around and around and around.

By Blogger Nineteen Words, at 4:59 AM  

Yeah... her facial expression screams "argh... I've dislocated my left wrist, as it's bent at an unfeasible angle, and oh holy s***, my right appears to have multiplied!

By Anonymous Steve, at 5:36 AM  

NASCAR Romance novels... hmmmm. Who would've ever thought??? Now I need to go get one for a laugh. That 3 armed princess is too f*cking much!!!!

By Blogger CampBlood, at 7:28 AM  

Hilarious. I didn't know there were others out there who were as amused by trash as I am...

By Blogger Princess Sparkle Pants, at 7:59 AM  

I think I know what's wrong with the picture. She has two right hands, one of them is holding his right hand and the other is along her side?

By Blogger Trudy, at 8:38 AM  

I'm so happy we don't have to look that dude’s cat butt belly button anymore!

Oh...SVH. I think I might need to stop by the book store and see what Jessica, Elizabeth and the rest of the gang are up to these days. I wonder if Bruce Patman is still a jerk. I'm also concerned that the mole on Elizabeth's left shoulder, I hope it hasn't metastasized.


By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:48 AM  

Or he's saying to her (in a heavy accent, of course) "Let me stroke you with this amputated arm and send shivers down your spine..." Yeah, she'll get shivers all right but they won't be of the "good" kind.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:55 PM  

I prefer to think that he's stroking her with a severed arm, maybe one he found at his last battle.
P.S. The second cover looks like Nich Lachey.

By Blogger E.B. Whitehead, at 5:39 PM  

I need to get me some naughti boy!

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:01 AM  

I demand to know what these are "awards" Christina Dodd has allegedly won.

By Anonymous june, at 1:22 PM  

Actually, I think the 2nd cover looks more like Mark Wahlberg.

By Blogger Trudy, at 10:08 AM  

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