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Monday, April 30, 2007 :::


Kmack came home early from work today because she threw out her back while blow-drying her hair this morning. For serious. I mocked her mercilessly, but a shocking discovery this weekend may shed some light on the situation. I present to you, Kmack's twelfth grade report card:

Ouch! A C-Minus in Personal Appearance. I can't imagine how it must feel to get judged as being "below average in personal appearance" by a high school home-ec teacher. I'm not exactly sure what is really involved in a class called Personal Appearance, but I'm assuming the curriculum had something to do with brushing hair and coordinating outfits, or the art of avoiding getting lipstick on your teeth. Kmack must have been sick the day they taught hair-drying. That's a lesson to us all: be cool, stay in school. Or suffer the consequences.

Of course, she's quite a lovely lady these days, so perhaps her past failures have caused no long term damage. Heck, even Einstein flunked math when he was a kid.

Anyway, now that's she getting married, her old nickname "Kmack" doesn't make much sense anymore since it was an amalgam of her first and last names. I've been trying to come up with a new one for the last couple months before her approaching wedding, and I think I've finally found one.

Get well soon, C-Minus!

::: posted by dan at 6:10 PM :: [ link ] :: (12) comments Social Bookmark Button

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12 previous comments:

Home Ec teachers are impossibly tough markers. I handed in a perfect and expertly-sewn purple corduroy skirt in grade 7. The result? Yup, C-. Though this could have been due to my comment "Put that in your pipe and smoke it" when I handed it in.

Maybe the Russian I mark as her new name?

By Blogger AMR, at 7:38 PM  

Poor K-Mack... She ios a lovely woman, but she does need to get a handle on her hairdryer skills before something really bad happens.

By Blogger CampBlood, at 7:20 AM  

middle school home ec teacher. She was nff.

I'd love to hear more about the "personal appearance" unit that Miss K did so poorly in. The rest of her classes looked challenging and she did well in those, yet only ranked 233/487 in her senior year. I'm guessing the Osseo area has some real brainiacs.

By Anonymous toddbee, at 7:24 AM  

I really like the comment at the bottom of the report card, "I hope these grades are a source of pride for you and yours." Who would write such a phrase at the bottom of a report card? Interesting.

By Blogger Stacy B, at 9:02 AM  

Is the future Mr. KMack aware of his financee's skill set?

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:57 PM  

Dan, your head looks like it's on a little kid's body...r u photoshopping us again???

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:29 PM  

A+ in Russian?? WOW!

By Blogger name, at 10:36 PM  

I threw my back out by coughing, so I wish I would of done it doing my hair, that sounds much better. I was out for a week and had to go to the Chiro. Feel better soon Kmack/cminus.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:25 AM  

Don't let Dan get you down, K-Mack. This anonymous poster has thrown his back out sneezing, reaching up for a curtain valance and sleeping.

At least he got it right about your loveliness.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:47 PM  

I threw my back out in the 11th grade when I attempted to head bang to Queen's: Bohemian front of the my bedroom. You know, like they did in Wayne's World?

Sad...very sad.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:57 PM  

K-Mack, I hope all of our posting has helped you feel better about your blow-drying trouble.

I threw my back out bending over to tie my shoes one morning.

By Blogger Trudy, at 10:12 AM  

Siema to my z Polski piszemy bo spodoba? nam s i ? Twój blog i ogl?damy go z kolego od któego masz pozdrowionka :P Chodak [if you don't understund, translate it .. :PP] see you that's my emalil :P {} see you byby

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:10 PM  

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