Friday, October 07, 2005 :::
My Hyundai service center just updated their waiting facilities with a children's play area and some computers for web surfing. So while sitting here waiting for an oil change during my lunch hour, I can totally post to my blog.
I can also listen to people in the waiting room talk loudly on their cell phones. Like this dude:
According to his loud public phone conversation, he was post-coitus sleeping with one of this current girlfriends when he started having a dream about "taking the best piss ever" but then suddenly in his dream the urinal was overflowing and splashing back onto him. That's when we woke up to discover that he had just wet his lady friend's bed.
So just as a reminder, if you talk on your cell phone too loudly, the guy who is blogging from the public computer in the room next to you can totally hear your every word. And he's got a camera phone.
What's almost more fun is checking out this public computer's History logs and Cookies folder. They use Websense to block offending websites from being surfable, but Websense stores the IP addresses of all attempted sites that it blocks. So with a little help from WhoIs, I can tell that Hyundai owners are some sick freaks by and large.
The Google Autofill logs are also a fun thing to peruse on public computers. Suddenly getting an oil change ain't so boring anymore.
::: posted by dan at 12:43 PM :: [ link ] :: (14) comments
14 previous comments:
Do hyundai owners like to stick it to you in uncomfortable places?
(....what, like the back of a hyundai?)
By Miss Celaneous, at 1:57 PM
so mister enuresis said all of this in earshot of how many people? did he happen to talk about the girlfriends reaction? did he strip the bed? did she kick him out? i must know!
By , at 3:08 PM
So what? So maybe this woman liked her bed soaking wet. You never know. Come on! Crazy woman is already dating a Hyundai owner.
A Hyundai owner, i tell ya. Hyundai. Owning! Not accidentely bumping into a Hyundai but actually owning one. Not his grannie's but his own. One Hyundai. Driving it. In public! Having paid for a He-yun-dai. Not scratching the paint but paying. Money. Good money. Money for a Hyundai. Shameless... might as well piss someone's bed.
By , at 4:20 PM
that is priceless... i only wish you had a face shot of said pisser
By aisy, at 4:35 PM
Hey I love my hyundai!
Anyway, after dropping the bomb that he pissed in his lady friend's bed, he said "Can you believe that? No, man, it was crazy," and then he changed the topic. I have a feeling that the type of girl he would be dating wouldn't be a stanger to dudes pissin' in her bed but I dunno.
There were at least five other people in the waiting area and he was making no attempt at lowering his voice or being out of earshot.
By dan, at 6:02 PM
Hyundai builds cars right here in river city, Montgomery, Alabama, so we engourage all of you all to buy several and tell your friends. It's definitely not your Uncle Ray's Hyundai! (oops, sorry canadiangirl)
By billthecatlives, at 6:28 PM
Thanks for sharing that story Dan - it really made my day! How sick of me.
Also, I just looked at my own Google autofills. Oh crap.
By Christine, at 6:49 AM
I once peed in my girlfriends bed. She's now my wife.
Oddest thing ever. Was at the bar and was fairly drunk, but not so much that I was getting the spins, or had any fear of getting a bad hangover much less pissing on myself. But, I too had a dream of a really long piss except it was into a hole in the ground.
I was still drunk and out of it when I discovered what I had done. I basically just woke her up and said matter-of-factly "we need to flip the bed over because I just accidently peed".
Wierd reaction from her. She just got up, helped me flip it over and we went back to bed like it was normal to pee the bed.
To this day, when we talk about it, the story isn't so much that I peed the bed, as much as our strange ho-hum reaction to it.
By , at 12:49 PM
i was told that a guy can't pee the bed if he is laying down and awake..too hard to do it that way..is that true?
By , at 4:34 PM
Oh, ..... it can be done, but not by my brother in law for example, he can't even pee with anyone else in the room. We we're out on a 25 foot open boat enjoying the ocean, eating some food, drinking a few beers, when it came time for him to pee 8 of us had to cram into the bow pretending to look the other way while he stood at the stern with his back to us desperatly trying to go....5 minutes later still nothing, 10 minutes later we're heading full speed ahead to shore so the poor boy won't explode or go insane whichever might come first.
By , at 10:10 AM
thank goodness (for you dan)there's no expectation of privacy when you are dumb enough to "Jerry Springer" yourself via your cell phone. why, oh why, must stupid people everywhere parade their stupidity like it's some big badge, pinned on their shirts?
By kelly, at 7:22 PM
Wow, just wow... that seems like the kind of story one should keep to themselves, forever and ever and definitely not tell to a friend on a cell phone in a waiting room of any kind, especially with strangers around. But maybe I'm just weird and everyone does that sort of thing.
By Gwenhwyfar, at 10:59 PM
that is too funny lmao!!!!!
By Phat Star, at 1:09 PM
i heart you, dan. you always make me laugh with your ridiculous anecdotes. that cell-phone guy is absolutely shameless. Was he proud of himself for such a spectacularly embarrassing stunt?
I want to know where you get your oil changed. I get stuck in a cramped, dingy office, with three-year-old copies of auto trader to thumb through while I wait, and complimentary truck-stop coffee. Maybe I should get I hyundai??
By , at 12:51 PM
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