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Sunday, September 25, 2005 :::

Goddamn it's almost October again already??

I hate dressing up for Halloween. It's too stressful and expensive and I'm too anal about accuracy. I'm like a Bridezilla only for Halloween costumes. Last year I spent way to much time and energy attempting to be the best Oompa Loompa ever, when it turns out I only had the ability to be the creepiest. (FYI, doing a keg stand in your Oompa Loompa costume is not a good idea. It smears the makeup and soggies-up the eyebrows.) The only reason I even bother is because a costume is required for T-bone's party. So this year I am going to take it down a notch and go as Purple Rain era Prince, because I kinda have a sordid love/hate relationship with the guy that goes back decades, and because I conveniently got a lacy purple velvet outfit from Target (which was un-copyright-infringably labeled as a "Purple Reign Rocker" costume) and now all I need is a wig and some eyeliner. But there's something wrong with me because I'm already going overboard by wondering how many days it would take me to actually grow the Prince facial hair rather than just pencil it in, and if I could get away with it at work:

Please make it stop. I tried researching other costumes, but came up empty:

Thundercats, Roar!
The Biggest Nerd Ever
Sexy Vader
Sexy Manga Fast Food Icons
Death Star
The Cast of Zoolander

I would consider the Zoolander idea if only to be able to utter one of my favorite movie lines of all time: "You think you're too cool for school. But I got a newsflash for you, Walter Kronkite... you aren't." Of course, if you are looking for costume ideas like I am, I would recommend attempting the infamous Princess Leia Slave Bikini, which you can buy or learn how to make here [thanks, james]. If I had the figure, I'd totally do it.

And don't forget the pets:

::: posted by dan at 10:37 PM :: [ link ] :: (21) comments Social Bookmark Button

Comments are Closed On this Post

21 previous comments:

darth looks like she has to go to the bathroom. #2 to be exact.

i love the little oompa weiner dog.

Dan, you will make an excellent Prince! For authenticity's sake, i think you should get copies of the Watchtower and try to convert people over the keg.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:17 AM  

Dan, I think you're being too hard on yourself over the Oompa Loompa costume. Oompa Loompas are creepy--period.

Everyone knows that, for girls, Halloween is just an excuse to dress like a slave girl so I'm off now to construct my Princess-Leia-Slave-Girl costume. Thanks for the links!

By Blogger Smartypants, at 9:01 AM  

That Tundercats costume just brought back all sorts of represed childhood memories.

By Blogger Angela, at 9:11 AM  

TOTALLY grow your own Prince-tash.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:59 AM  

One year I saw a woman in a Cheetara outfit. I think the only reason she wore it was as an excuse to be 75% naked at a party and get some attention. It worked for her. Likewise, that Thundercats guy has a pretty attractive midsection, even if his face is freaky and he looks like he's wearing Depends.

By Blogger Dennis!, at 12:36 PM  

I swear, the Asian McDonaldland characters were in a dream I once had...wait, so was that sexy Lion-O dude. Just kidding, I liked the Silverhawks way better.

By Blogger brent, at 12:37 PM  

I love Prince. And I cannot wait for pictures of your costume. If I went as Prince for Halloween I would able to say my favorite all-time Prince lyric to everyone within earshot: 'Girl's got an ass like I've never seen, and the ride is so smooth, you must be a limousine"

Now that's poetry.

By Blogger Elle Marie, at 3:58 PM  

the thundercats one was creepy. it reminded me of this TRON dude.

By Blogger aisy, at 5:26 PM  

The Leia model is the defination of "mousey"

By Blogger elcynic, at 5:49 PM  

I luv (insert bubble-y drawn heart here)your oompa loompa! what scared the holy bejesus out of me was that tron guy. OMG.

By Blogger kelly, at 7:51 PM  

What scared the crap out of me was the Tron guys butt. How exactly does that happen to ones butt?

By Blogger Colleen, at 8:47 PM  

More important than the stash - can you lose about 75 pounds to get down to Prince's weight of 75 pounds in time for halloween?

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:28 PM  

I find the Thundercat guy most interesting because he obviously dressed like that at the office! How long before his pink slip arrived (no cross dressing pun intended!)

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:31 PM  

Brent said:
"I swear, the Asian McDonaldland characters were in a dream I once had..."

I think he was dreaming about clown porn
(do not watch at work)

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:46 AM  

I definitely was not dreaming of clown porn. I have sexy dreams, but they never ever involve clowns. Circus freeks maybe, but never clowns. Stemming from a disturbing episode of Fantasy Island about a clown ventriloquist puppet that comes to life and torments his creator. Like a lot of people, I am deathly afraid of clowns (and ventriloquism).

So, as curious as I am to see the link, I fear witnessing it would send me into an instant state of hysterical blindness. And I need my eyes for work...

By Blogger brent, at 12:03 PM  

Thundercats HO!!!!!!!

By Blogger Biglug, at 1:42 PM  

Was it Thundercats Ho? Dang, I couldn't remember.

That clownporn thing is absolutely terrifying. Not sexy. Not sext at all.

By Blogger dan, at 9:20 PM  

seeing that thundercats guy in his cubicle made me want to die.


By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:23 AM  

Is it bad I kinda like the Manga McDonalds outfits?

What's funny is that I saw a guy the other day wearing bright red pants, a bright yellow shirt and a bright yellow puffy jacket. It made me crave french fries.

By Blogger vespabelle, at 2:14 PM  

the pup is so hilarious. i just keep picturing it saying "what what beyotches? you want some of this??"

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:12 PM  

Did you make the costume for the dog because i have 5 weiners and think that it would be a great outfit for my biggest. if you can help me that would be great.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:47 PM  

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