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Wednesday, December 23, 2009 :::

The Season of Giving

I was at the gas station yesterday and I had just purchased my Powerball tickets. I was about to leave when I heard the customer at the cashier next to me say "Hey man, do you have that new Mario game for the Wii?" and the guy behind the counter said, "We don't sell video games here. It's a gas station."

So I looked over and saw that the curious customer was a younger fella, maybe around the age of 14 or so, and not mentally handicapped, but certainly not at the head of his class either. The boy continued "No man, I'm not asking if you sell it, I'm asking if you have it."

The employee said "You mean, like, personally?" the older cashier asked.

"Yeah, man," he answered.

So the gas station attendant answered a little warily, "No, I don't."

"Oh, man, that's too bad cuz it's really cool."

There was an awkward silence. I looked around and realized that everyone in the gas station was watching the interaction with mild interest. The conversation seemed over, but the cashier and boy were still locking eyes, expectantly. Finally, the boy broke the silence:

"You know what else is cool?" he asked.

After a long beat, the cashier finally relented and responded, "No... what?"

"Dirty magazines," replied the kid, a little too quickly.

Like a good train wreck, nobody could take their eyes off the scene. The cashier stared at the boy. The boy stared at the cashier. The entire gas station stared at the duo. And all the dirty magazines behind the counter stared back at everyone. That's when I realized what game the kid was playing, and how badly he was playing it.

The crowd waited with anticipation, wondering how the cashier would reply. But he must have been an expert at this kind of situation, because he glared at the boy without blinking or breaking eye contact, waited just long enough for it to get extremely uncomfortable, and then replied with as little inflection as possible:

"Okay then, have a good day."

The kid got the hint and left, seemingly unshamed by the exchange. I guess I can't blame the kid for trying, but he's gotta work on his strategy a bit.

Speaking of the possibility of free p0rn, I finally got rid of the BBOP. The willing recipient will have to reveal him/herself in his/her own good time. But I'm glad to be rid of that thing. I hope it's better appreciated in its new home.

::: posted by dan at 7:26 PM :: [ link ] :: (4) comments Social Bookmark Button

Comments are Closed On this Post

4 previous comments:

Oh Dan, you act as if I have any dicernable discretion.

Did you just blog my address? It's not that small in that picture... Let the stalking begin!

A few tapes have made their way under other people's xmas trees. A few have found their way into my coffee table collection. All have been appreciated properly.

By Anonymous sarah, at 3:49 PM  

frick. discernable***

By Anonymous sarah again, at 3:51 PM  

If you can make out any single digit in that address then you are eagle eye sarah and that is what I will call you from now on.

By Blogger dan, at 4:57 PM  

I tried to zoom in and it and to my surprise the image didn't get crystal clear. If only we had the secret software they use on CSI.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8:43 AM  

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