Tuesday, April 05, 2005 :::
M. Night Shyamlan's next movie project has been announced. It's apparently about a superintendent who finds a sea nymph in the building's swimming pool (no joking). Since Shyamalan is well known for "ending his movies with fantastic, breathtaking, totally unbelievable and sometimes quite retarded plot twists," the people at Fametracker have decided to create some betting odds on what the twist of the sea nymph might be, although I'm not sure a movie about a sea nymph living in a swimming pool actually requires a twist ending. Anyway, here are some of my favorite theories in their odds list:
The sea nymph has superpowers but is vulnerable to water: 7 to 2
The sea nymph was dead all along: 6 to 1
The sea nymph's mother was dead all along - just a wig and a rocking chair:
12 to 1
The sea nymph isn't real, but is actually the village idiot, dressed up in straw and blankets: 15 to 1
It turns out Paul Giamatti is trapped on a planet of sea nymphs, who've actually "discovered" him - who's the sea nymph now?: 17 to 1
The sea nymph is really a Sea Monkey - and they're all in a giant aquarium!: 2 to 1
The sea nymph is Keyser Soze: 50 to 1
The sea nymph leads Paul Giamatti to an enormous statue of Aperaham Lincoln: 25 to 1
That last one cracks me up. Actually, I like all of M. Night's movies. Yes, even The Village. But it's still a funny list [thanks to J-D]. Read them all here.
::: posted by dan at 12:47 PM :: [ link ] :: (6) comments
6 previous comments:
What about if the sea nymph is the last nymph on earth and is left in the giant library....and then realizes that she can't read all the books OUTSIDE of the water...huh? huh?
okay. i don't think i can write this stuff.....
By locomocos, at 3:30 PM
I bet the odds on that one would be pretty low, but I appreciate the Twighlight Zone reference.
By dan, at 6:53 PM
oh! oh! It will be like that wonderful movie with Walter Pigeon called, um... what the hell is it called? "The Mermaid and Mr. Muir." no.
Um, oh shit.
But it was WONDERFUL and so romantic -- about a married man with a gorgeous mermaid in his pool. And the leading man wasn't disgusting and schlubby like Paul Giamatti.
I don't want to see it if it's all scary and weird. I'll get the old one from Netflix and ignore Paul Giamatti and his hairy back and grey teeth.
By PeaceBang, at 2:50 PM
It's called "Mr. Peabody and the Mermaid," starring William Powell and Ann Blyth. ADORABLE. So THERE, M. Night.
By PeaceBang, at 2:55 PM
The sea nymph and Paul Giamatti decide that the only affordable housing is offered to women, so they dress up like girls and go live in an all-girl hotel. Their new names are Buffy and Hildegarde.
Meanwhile Paul Giamati poses as his own brother - and falls for one of the other girls in the hotel...
By BigLug, at 3:12 PM
That is FAN-TAS-TIC. Well, the story sounds weird as all hell...but I do love the Shalalalalalaman. And Paul Giamatti. Not in a hot sort of way either...that would just be weird...
By Monkey, at 3:17 PM
< Back to Blog
The Legacy of Dan Miller
Boooo. I'm boring.
Newsflash: Trailer all blowed up.
The recipe for happiness.
Really not cute.
Get your act together.
WDAN in Minneapolis
beware of the blog
b stacy b
trek geek scott
and far away
the big lug
girls are pretty
more cow bell
world of wonder