Tuesday, August 24, 2004 :::
I always get a sick stomach when I hear radio commercials for the Renaissance Festival. It means fall is here. It also means that a thousand weird nerds will gather in Shakopee to celebrate unicorns.
I remember one fall day about ten years ago: I was working at Adventures In Video (Best. Job. Ever.) and this guy came in all dressed up in tights and a feathery cap and some leather trim, obviously just back from a day at the festival. He had a friend with him who was dressed in plain old jeans and a sweatshirt. The festival nerd had a walking-sword thing, and he came up, thwapped it on the counter in front of me, and said something creepy like "Doest thou have a copy of The Net, my good man?" I replied that we did not, and he responded with a "hey-nonny-nonny" or a "tra-la-la" or something. Just kidding, but he did register his disgust with a grunt. After he picked out a different movie, he informed me that he would be paying with "royal coins bearing the king's insignia," and so he paid with silver dollars from a sack he had hanging from his twine belt. I tried not to roll my eyes, but let me tell you, silver dollars wreaked havoc when it came to the video store's closing procedure and the preparation of the bank deposit slip, so I wasn't too happy about it. Upon leaving, his plain-clothed friend said his one and only word: "Sorry."
What was impressive was that he never went out of character the whole time he was in the store. He was so dedicated to the role that I was surprised when he didn't challenge me to a duel or a joust or threaten to put me in the stockade whatever it is they do there at the Renaissance Festival. But then I really shouldn't be surprised because the nerds really like to commit to their obsessions. It's full-on gonzo or bust with them. Ain't no inbetween.
::: posted by dan at 9:13 PM :: [ link ] :: (10) comments
10 previous comments:
Oooooo, you are so gonna get an earfull from Scott for even remotely cutting on the festival...bummer for you.
I love to go there to eat. Even though it's pricey. But good Turkey legs. Yum.
By Colleen, at 9:53 PM
excuse me are we in direct competition now?
By Stacy, at 10:19 PM
Oh, there's no competition.
By dan, at 11:37 PM
Ok, just what the hell is your problem with the Renaissance Festival? It is an enjoyable thing to do if you just put yourself in the right frame of mind. Granted this dipstick that came into Adventures in Video has a little problem getting out of character when he leaves the fair but at the fair it is part of the atmoshpere. There are humorous acts at the fair, good food, cool shops and it is an all around good time. Sometimes I wonder about you little bro'. When was the last time you went to the Renaissance Festival? The food alone is worth the trip. Turkey legs (Nummy), Cream puffs (aaaagghgh), Sausage on a stick, Corn on the Cob, Carameled Apples. Damn it I just gained 5 pounds just thinking about it.
I am not defending people who can't get out of character when they leave but, I really hope this one guy didn't ruin your opinion of what could be a very enjoyable day.
By Trekgeekscott, at 7:37 AM
Naw, it wasn't just him. The food is mediocre and over priced, the shows are the same every year or at least the jokes are pretty one-note, all you can buy in the stores is jewelry, I don't like sitting on hay, it rains every year that I go, it costs way too much to get in, and I always get embarassed for the people who dress up. But then I don't usually get into such fanciful things. My brain is too practical to enjoy something like that. I prefer modern day conveniences like pavement and eating utensils. That's just the way I am. But I'm not saying that everyone who goes to the festival is a nerd, I'm just saying that the festival attracts nerds.
By dan, at 9:38 AM
Wow, you're all about angering the lovers of the festival, aren't you? Personally, I've never been there. Yep, never. Never had one of the infamous turkey legs or seen any of the usual characters. But I see no reason for you to hate on others that enjoy it. Wow, Dan. I think you're getting a little too big for your britches. (But I have to admit, sausage on a stick isn't something that's going to necessitate an inaugural visit on my part- yuck!)
By hot babe, at 12:26 PM
If the fair can attract geeks like me, of course it will attract nerds.
Ok, I think we can agree that we don't agree about the festival. One interesting point is that the festival is under new ownership now. Maybe things will be better now. Maybe there will be newer acts.
By Trekgeekscott, at 12:34 PM
Hot babe, you are such a drama queen. Always trying to stoke a fire where there isn't one.
Anywho, I understand a lot of people like the festival. I am just not one of them, that's all.
By dan, at 1:49 PM
Ouch. That drama queen comment always seems to sting much less when it comes from one of the bigest drama queens I know.
I still say sausage on a stick sounds gross.
By hot babe, at 4:11 PM
If it's sunny out and there is a nice breeze and the leaves are all pretty colors, it's not the worst place to be in the world. I don't think I would care to eat one of those turkey legs or any sausage on a stick. But the carmeled apples are good.
By Kristina, at 11:41 AM
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