Friday, April 10, 2009 :::
Lesson one: riding a bike requires a minimum amount of multitasking.
Lesson two: never trust your siblings.
Lesson three: it's always best to turn the other cheek.
Speaking of trusting your siblings...
I have vivid memories of a game my sisters used to play with me when I was about four years old that involved blindfolding me and leaving me in unknown places while warning me about certain unavoidable death if I stayed there, and at the same time tricking me into thinking I'd also die if I moved a muscle. It went something like this:
After closing me behind a fence gate with the sound of a dog barking in the distance: "We just accidentally locked you in Bruto's kennel, danny. Bruto is a big black doberman with a taste for blood. That's him barking in the background! He's barking because he knows you've invaded his territory! We're going to run and hide, but maybe if you stand real still he'll only bite you a few times!!!!!"
Or, after balancing me on a broken wagon wheel in some unsuspecting neighbor's backyard: "Oh my god danny, you've walked right onto a bear trap! It's old and rusty and we don't know how long it will hold! If you even move an inch it will surely snap and cut you in two!!!!!"
Or, after placing me barefoot in the middle of a patch of sharp piercing grass and spiky burrs: "Danny! You've stepped into a gigantic beehive! You're walking all over them and they are getting angry! Stand really still or they will swarm and sting you to death! Oh my god I can hear them coming!!!!!"
It was a lot of fun. For some reason it never even occurred to me that I could take off the blindfold.
::: posted by dan at 7:30 AM :: [ link ] :: (6) comments
6 previous comments:
Damn, you have some mean sisters. LOL And the animated gifs are great as usual.
By CampBlood, at 10:01 AM
I only wish I had thought of this when I was the mean big sister. I did however figure out how to get my younger sisters to clean my room by playing "Queen and Servant". Worked like a charm.
By , at 5:29 PM
Lessons one and two are a scream. goodness.
By , at 12:14 PM
When I was about 8 and my sister 3 I used to pretend I was dead. Every day. I'd lie there, really still, until she started to cry and then I'd roll over and laugh like a maniac. She fell for it every time. About 25 years later she told me that she HAD to fall for it because what if she didn't and that turned out to be the one time I was actually dead?
Man, I was a mean big sister.
By Two Job Mama, at 9:21 AM
Um... I remember none of this. I remember a certain someone stealing my underwear... and kicking my sunburnt shins. Sure we fed you dead flies, but blindfold freezies, I don't think so.
By me, at 4:28 PM
Hey, I don't remember the freeze game. I do know that we fed you "baby alive" doll food...You licked it up!
By SistaK, at 3:24 PM
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