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Friday, October 31, 2008 :::

Animated Friday (Halloween Horrors Edition)!

It's fun to scare people on Halloween...

...Because you never know what reaction you're going to get!

As a bonus, and with an advance apology, here are some non-animated Halloween Horrors for you to enjoy:

Non-Animated Halloween Horror #1:
Creepy Half-Robot Dance Partner

Non-Animated Halloween Horror #2:
Dreadlocks Gone Horribly, Horribly Wrong

Non-Animated Halloween Horror #3:
Zombie Bird On The Loose (This one is too gross to post upfront so I'm going to make you click to view it. You've been forewarned.)


::: posted by dan at 7:33 AM :: [ link ] :: (7) comments Social Bookmark Button


Thursday, October 30, 2008 :::

Great Minds Think Alike

The other day at Subway I was crabby about something unrelated when I noticed how my Sandwich Artist was placing the slices of cheese on my six-incher. They were all overlapping and stupid and it totally defeated the point of having the cheese slices cut into triangular shapes in the first place. The idiocy of it all made me inexplicably angry, but I bit my tongue because I didn't want to be the crazy guy at the fast food restaurant, like that lady who called 911 when Burger King wouldn't make her sandwich her way.

Anyway, I swallowed my anger (literally and figuratively) until I got home and decided to design a diagram to illustrate my complaint more efficiently, but a quick Google search revealed that someone has beat me to the punch:

At least now I know that I'm not alone in my crusade.

And yes, I had too much time on my hands that day and I'm feeling much better now.

::: posted by dan at 11:09 PM :: [ link ] :: (7) comments Social Bookmark Button


Monday, October 27, 2008 :::


Oh my god, someone somewhere has discovered something brilliant.


Not my discovery, but at the very least I can pass it on to aid in its dissemination. It needs to be heard all across the land. Someone running for vice president of one of the most influencial countries in the world just got their first passport ever last year. Yay for America where anything can happen!

::: posted by dan at 10:58 PM :: [ link ] :: (12) comments Social Bookmark Button


Friday, October 24, 2008 :::

Animated Friday (Birthday Bummer Edition)!

In honor of my blog's belated birthday last week, I'm dedicating this week's animated Friday to birthday bummers:

The Stealthy Attack

The Not-So-Stealthy Attack

::: posted by dan at 12:11 PM :: [ link ] :: (1) comments Social Bookmark Button


Monday, October 20, 2008 :::


I'm at the car dealership over my lunch hour getting an oil change and I was using one of the computers in the waiting area to check my email when I hit Ctrl-V, and this is what popped up:

"Cheezie -- im gonna nibble ur nubz off"

What are nubz?

I also found these images on the harddrive of this communal computer:

I don't know if this guy is the aforementioned "Cheezie" of if he is the one wanting to do the nub nibblin' or if he's totally unrelated, but I like to keep my bottles and cups on the kitchen floor, too. Why not? And then there's this pic:

This picture seems to depict a Halloween party, and if I'm not mistaken, that girl is wearing a Sexy Ghostbuster costume, which means that the Sexy Halloween costume meme has finally jumped the shark. It reminds me of this series of images that I created last year.

Public computers are fun.

::: posted by dan at 12:30 PM :: [ link ] :: (6) comments Social Bookmark Button


Thursday, October 16, 2008 :::

Congratulations are in order.

I went to the gym today without incident.

To celebrate, I'm going to post these pics of a super cute asian baby and some dick with chopsticks:

::: posted by dan at 2:46 PM :: [ link ] :: (4) comments Social Bookmark Button


Tuesday, October 14, 2008 :::

Pure Class

The company I work for celebrated its 10th anniversary this weekend, and although I have a history of regrettable work party behavior, I think that this year I conducted myself with a relatively high amount of integrity, professionalism, and decorum.

Hey, I said relatively.

Anyway, happy anniversary and congratulations to everyone involved.

::: posted by dan at 6:44 AM :: [ link ] :: (8) comments Social Bookmark Button


Sunday, October 12, 2008 :::

Six and Still Sexy!

I don't know what to say. I mean, I know I was busy traveling the globe over the last month, and I was sick for a week to boot. Plus, work has really been all-consuming lately. But I really should stop making excuses for my unforgivable behavior. I obviously don't even know how I could let it happen, but I have to confess that I've forgotten my blog's birthday.

Planetdan officially turned six on September 20th, 2008, and I didn't get it a present. I didn't take it to dinner. I didn't even bother to utter the words Happy Birthday. I can only hope that with time it will forgive me. I will start my act on contrition by throwing a party in its favor, but I don't know what you guys are going to do to get back into its good graces. Good luck with that, though.

::: posted by dan at 4:26 PM :: [ link ] :: (10) comments Social Bookmark Button


Friday, October 10, 2008 :::

Animated Friday (Not Funny but Fascinating Edition)!

Not all animated GIFs feature pratfalls and . Some are purely edumacational. Such as:

The slow-motion physics of water-balloons

The power of tornadoes and the danger of crossing their path

The creepiness of high-tech robots

See? Now don't you feel like a more well-rounded person for having seen those?

::: posted by dan at 4:21 PM :: [ link ] :: (2) comments Social Bookmark Button


Wednesday, October 08, 2008 :::

Fist-Pumpin' Fun

Don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of Obama. I think he's a genuine fella and I think he did an okay job in the debates last night. But I don't think I've ever seen anyone pull off a natural-looking "fist pump". It's just not a believable form of solidarity for anyone over forty. Or under forty for that matter:

Or maybe it's just me.

::: posted by dan at 7:30 AM :: [ link ] :: (7) comments Social Bookmark Button


Sunday, October 05, 2008 :::


I spent the last couple weeks in Italy. There was wine-tasting and day-tripping and grape-eating and lack-of-sleeping and lard-eating and euro-spending and garden-strolling and cocktail-sipping and gourmet-eating and oh-my-god-I'm-so-effing-exhausted-I-wanna-die-but-I-swear-I'm-not-complaining.

Rather than posting the usual random collection of photos featuring people you don't know and events you didn't get to take part in, I tried to recreate some of the beautiful scenery you missed by stitching together collections of photos I took of my favorite Italian places. Be sure to click on them for bigger, more engrossing versions:

Viterbo, Tuscany:

Sant' Antimo, Tuscany:

Sistine Chapel, Rome:

Assissi, Tuscany:

The Etruscan Terrace, Vatican:

See? It's just like you were there, isn't it? I still might post the usual random collection of photos featuring people you don't know and events you didn't get to take part in, but I gotta get rid of this headcold and jetlag first.

::: posted by dan at 3:31 PM :: [ link ] :: (6) comments Social Bookmark Button


Saturday, October 04, 2008 :::

Animated Friday (Slacker Pothead Edition)!

It seems like all the animated GIFs I come across lately seem to feature painful falls by random idiots. I've been trying to find less violent files that feature less annoying people, just for the sake of variety, but I guess beggars can't be choosers, so here we go again.

Stay off the drugs, kids, cuz:

Mary Jane Gives you Bad Ideas.

and False Confidence.

Pothead slackers are funny.

::: posted by dan at 3:19 PM :: [ link ] :: (1) comments Social Bookmark Button


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Vote Lombard!
Final Destination: Death by Homeownership
Happy Halloween!
Animated Friday (Pets: A Two Parter Edition)!
All Swine Flu-ed Out
Animated Friday (Pets: A Two Parter Edition)!
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