planetdan

Monday, November 21, 2005 :::

Rampant zombie consumerism!

Where to find the bestest shopping deals this coming Friday:

Black Friday, 2005: The Book of Shadows

So, if you want to spend a day rubbing ass to gut with god knows who and seeing WAY more stirrup-pant/T-shirt combo outfits than you ever thought possible, then going to Wal-Mart on Black Friday Morning may just be the adventure you've been looking for. Plus, you could score a non-brand-name DVD player for, like, thirty bucks.

Personally, I can't think of anything that looks less fun than this (except perhaps having my eyeball eaten out by ants):

Wait, that last one is from the Katrina aftermath. And one of them might be from the Parisian riots. But still, I'm staying home that day. Better safe than sorry.

::: posted by dan at 11:37 PM :: [ link ] :: (13) comments

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13 previous comments:

The best advice is to NEVER shop Wal-Mart. EVER!!

By

Mike, at 7:37 AM

Mike makes a good point. "Black Friday" or not, Wal-Mart is definitely NOT the place to go... ever. If you must go to a place like that, make it Target...please.

By

Kristen, at 9:14 AM

Those riot pictures and Katrina picture totally fit in with the others. Remember you CAN buy a gun and a bike at Walmart. And I'm pretty sure that they let you in without a shirt.

Stirrup pants should be illegal.

By

Biglug, at 9:38 AM

Here's an idea... Why not do something meaningful for the holidays instead of waiting in line at Kmart or Walmart or Crapmart to buy a bunch of cheap electronic crap that's going to break in a couple years and go in landfill. Just an idea.

(I am proud to say I've never stepped foot in a Walmart.)

By

tcarole, at 9:55 AM

WAL~MART...ew
Ass to gut rubbing... ew
stirrup pants... ew
Ants eatting eyeballs... double ew
Man there was nothing about that story that I liked.

By

Gwenhwyfar, at 9:56 AM

Okay, I don't know what Wal-Marts are like where you guys are, but I do go on a regular basis...of course the one near me is a Super Wal-Mart with grocery store combined. And although I make it a policy NOT to go anywhere near any shopping type places on Black Friday, I do find the local Wal-Mart a great source of freak watching entertainment...
Ain't a thing wrong with shopping there....good prices on stuff.
I'll give anybody a stink-eye that says otherwise ;-)

By

pixelala, at 11:49 AM

Hells no. I plan on sleeping in and enjoying the long weekend.

By

Monkey, at 12:58 PM

Black Friday? Maybe we don't have this in Canada, or I've been living under the radar. Either way, it sounds like a good thing to miss. BTW I love Walmart, one stop shopping & great prices!

By

canadiangirl, at 1:54 PM

tcarole: you really should go, just to see how horrible it really is. i was amazed.

pixelala: the problem with the good prices is is that walmart drives local stores out of business by undercutting their prices and then pays people lower wages. they're also unfair to the factories that manufacture their products: they give them a contract, then threaten to pull the contract if they don't expand (which they can't afford, but they can't afford to lose the contract either) and then they demand ever-decreasing prices (which the factory can't refuse since now that they've expanded, they REALLY can't afford to lose the business).

By

Anonymous, at 2:25 PM

There is a Mason-Dixon Line in front of every Wal-Mart.

By

Bewareoftheblog, at 4:54 PM

I was going to the Mall on Friday but I just found the gift eveyone I'm getting everyone this year. I can sleep in this year

http://www.knowgangs.com/store/index.php/cPath/23_128

By

Anonymous, at 12:36 AM

Every year you remind me about Black Friday. Every year I forget. Every year I end up at some store smashed in the aisles between stupid people and screaming kids slapping myself in the forehead muttering "damn damn damn damn damn."

By

Colleen, at 8:48 AM

My favorite Black Friday was when I lived in St. Paul and my then-boyfriend and I looked at each other and said, "Yep, it's the day to go to the new MALL OF AMERICA." Because we were that sick.
We walked around in an over-stimulated daze for hours and left empty-handed. It was like 11 or 12 years ago. Geez.

By

PeaceBang, at 8:06 PM

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