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Wednesday, August 03, 2005 :::

Now, with more funny!

The awful new Shoebox greeting card commercial actually promises "new, funnier Shoebox greeting cards". They make it sound like it's as easy as adding more stuffing to an Oreo. Now, with more funny! If it was that easy to be funnier, why didn't they do it years ago. Was it a trend thing? Were lame greeting cards all the rage last year? So that must mean being unfunny isn't "in" anymore. Being unfunny must have had a long run at the top, though, because I honestly haven't read a truly funny greeting card in years.

Unrelatedly, I bought some new Listerine Teeth Whitening Pre-Brush Rinse. In my head, it was the best idea ever: whiten your teeth with a one-minute minty fresh rinse! Not so much. Sure, there's a trace of mint somewhere in there, but even more prominent is the taste of sea water, peroxide, and just a hint of pickle. Not to mention the strange sudsy action, which makes it akin to gargling handsoap. Anyway, it's not getting the planetdan stamp of approval.

::: posted by dan at 7:55 PM :: [ link ] :: (7) comments Social Bookmark Button

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7 previous comments:

I you say you haven't read a funny card in a while, then you haven't gotten a Squibnocket card. They're outrageously overpriced, but they're made by one guy, Lane Foard, and I'm willing to pay for something less lame than "Shoebox." (plus it makes me seem "witty" when I send them) He has a website, but I don't think it's operational yet. Seriously though, get a Squibnocket.

By Blogger Kevdogg, at 9:15 PM  

My family likes to buy cards and just sign "Poop." inside. Takes the task outta finding a funny card.
Or we just give inappropriate "Congrats on the baby" cards for birthdays. That all started with my mom and her natural ability to pick out Bar Mitzvah cards for Baptisms and later gasp in sheer horror over it.
Now we just do it on purpose.

By Blogger Monkey, at 10:19 PM  

You're right on about the Listerine Teeth Whitening rinse tasting like ass. The first night I used it my face lit up with the horror of having such a vile concoction in my mouth. Then I started foaming at the mouth due to its sudsy action and my fiancee thought I was turning into a rabid beast, "I always knew this day would come!" he shouts. funny.

By Anonymous Dollface, at 9:24 AM  

Its funny you mention that, cuz at the little deli I go to b4 work, they have all these cheesy ass greeting cards and one of the headers is "Almost Funny" which is strangely right next to "Funeral". Now that's funny--almost.

By Blogger jeremy, at 10:48 AM  

But did it make your teeth whiter?

By Anonymous Rebecca, at 12:22 PM  

I haven't noticed any results of its whitening capabilities yet, but then I've only been able to stomache gargling with it twice so far.

By Blogger dan, at 3:42 PM  

I will give an endorsment of Crest White Strips. They seem to work pretty well and are a much cheaper alternative to having your teeth whitened at the dentist. My finance has been using them for the last 2 weeks (14 day pack) and her teeth are much whiter than mine, so now she got me a box too and I have to use them.

(perhaps hers are whiter anyway because i drink coffee a lot)

By Blogger buba69, at 1:26 PM  

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